Positive Discipline? Positively!

Positive discipline is based on the idea

That children are born without knowing

What we expect of them.

Joan E. Durant

Can't help wondering... what you're wondering about?

Although I never doubt that most of us do wrong by our children on a regular basis, generally unintentionally, and would do otherwise if we knew we were harming them and how to parent more effectively, I seldom feel positive about suggesting alternatives.

Most I've discovered tend toward the dogmatic, inundate the parent with too much extraneous information, or fail to provide sufficient information necessary for understanding and application. Consider a fishing manual that dictates one formulae for success, another that tells you everything you have no need to know about raising troical fish, and another that gives great instructions but fails to provide a list of the necessary equipment.

However, today I found a manual on discipline that I feel comfortable in recommending and supporting without reservation. I find the basic philosophy is based on the rights of the child as a human being combined with respect for the diversity of parenting values. The content is thorough. The order of presentation is logical. The materials are easy to read and understand.

And, as agrees with my training about how we learn, the concepts are repeated, and repeated and repeated in different formats, so the learner has the opportunity to accomodate and assimilate using various "hooks" on which to hang the knowledge for quicker and easier access when needed...which will often be during emotional times when we won't be inclined to go looking for a manual, or take the time to search among the scrambling brain cells for answers to the immediate problem.

The only immediate negatives I note about this manual are the difficulty in locating it, and the length...over 300 pages!...but don't be dissuaded from checking it out on that account as it is a work-book manual, so lots of fill-in-the blank pages.

I also want to forewarn you that this site is easy to get lost in... there is so much interesting information available on Corporal Punishment from every perspective, and not separate URL's to make access to individual articles easy.

http://www.endcorporalpunishment.org/pages/frame.html
Positive Discipline: What it is and how to do it.
(At Site Map, scroll down; click on "New Resource on Positive Discipline" link on the right side of page; scroll down and click on "Positive Discipline Manual" link)

http://www.endcorporalpunishment.org/pages/frame.html
Positive Discipline: Web Resources for Parents and Teachers on Discipline without Corporal Punishment
(At Site Map, click on RESOURCES on the left for an incredibly thorough selection of resources!)

www.visutech.net/peace365/sign-petition.asp

Answers for Parents

A Child is Waiting,
Take care...be aware,
Nancy Lee

Spending Time...and Resources...Wisely?

If we can spend

four days on a cat's custody,

we can spend a little time

on what happens to women and children

after they leave an abusive relationship.

Paige Hodson

Can't help wondering...how we set our priorities when it comes to child abuse?

Recently, in the local news: a story about a 34 year old mother who allegedly murdered her newborn last year by putting her in two plastic bags. She just gave birth to another healthy baby girl. What concerns me even more than usual about this story is that there is also a 13 year old daughter in the home. I can't help but wonder why the 13 year old daughter wasn't removed from the home after the death of the other baby last year. Was this wise?


But wise or not, there are stories galore on siblings left in a home after a child was killed there. And stories galore with an element that defies belief but somehow gets accepted as truth for lack of evidence to the contrary. Babies accidentally rolled on by sleeping adults... babies left alone in a tub who mysteriously drown...babies who can barely stand who turn on the hot water tap and get scalded to death...babies dead while their killers go free by agreeing to lesser charges. Wise use of time and resources?

There are ways to learn and explore methods of preventing child abuse. There are organizations like Comfort House, working on developing more effective ways to work with children after abuse without further traumatizing them by repeated interviews. There are alternatives to the ways we presently use time and resources in relationship to child abuse. But there still seems to be even more ways to avoid making any changes that might seriously change the outcomes for children at risk. Wise? Why not?